CaliforniaFamilyNew YorkpregnancySan Diego

I am from NYC… I Can Do Anything!

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When you are brought up in a city that never sleeps it makes you a special kind of person.  New Yorker’s can pretty much take on any situation head on and we usually can persevere no matter what the outcome is.  You see, when you are brought up in one of the biggest and best cities in the world, you become quite strong.  I am not exactly sure what makes us this way, but I would say the weather plays a part of it.  Having a true 4 seasons does something to you.  You learn how to show up through the thunderstorms, the snow and the heat waves. Like Sinatra sings, “If I can make it there, I’ll make it anywhere.”

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I can recall working at the Versace showroom and having to commute from Staten Island to Manhattan everyday.  Yes, Staten Island is only 8 miles from the city, but it would still take an hour and half to get there.  When you do a commute like that for years back and forth you think you can handle any driving situation.  For example, I live in La Jolla and commute one exit to Carmel Valley for recreational activities with the kids and people question me all the time, “How are you doing with that commute?”  I answer the same way like I always do, “I am from NY,  I can commute anywhere, this is nothing compared to NY.”  Yes that is true.  New York is known for the honking of horns, treacherous traffic and people screaming and flicking you off with their daily road rage.  San Diego on the other hand… not so much.

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Dealing with bad weather and heavy traffic was an everyday occurrence while living in NYC.  You just didn’t think twice when having to commute over an hour each way to go to work in terrible conditions, it was the norm.

Now here in San Diego where its perfect all year around, us New Yorker’s, laugh at those who think commuting a few exits is way too much.  Grant it, California does not have the best drivers, so both hands have to be on the wheel.  Actually, it’s quite shocking how  people make rights on red without ever coming to a full stop.  It’s quite scary.

It’s funny when you talk to other NY’ers who reside here.  In this case, she’s a dear friend of mine who commutes 45 minutes towards the border not once, but twice a day.  After my 5 days of crying over my new commute I finally called her and asked how in the world are you doing this commute?  She replied, “What?  I used to commute from the Bronx to Queens.  This drive is nothing.”  There you have it… most NY’ers think they can drive anywhere for however long do to being refined by the best, NYC traffic.

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However, add 9 1/2 months pregnant to the mix with 3 kids in tow and I am now a hot mess.   What happened to, I am from NY and I wear a cape and nothing can stop me attitude?  I don’t know!  Blame it on the belly!  Our kids are in a new school where we are building a home so the commute is a good 25 – 30 minutes there and longer going home.  I am doing that twice a day with baby legs kicking me in the ribs.  It’s insane.  My cape has been thrown to the curb and I am a weakling complaining everyday to whomever will listen to me on blue tooth.  Wherever my NY self is, I miss her and need her back turbo charged.

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The end of pregnancy is rough.  It really really is… and I have three others who need me.  I have been chanting this is temporary and I can do anything because I am NY strong.  However, I am not looking to try to give birth on a freeway and be on the 5:00 news, so it’s time to make some temporary changes to my temporary discomfort.  Part time help is coming real soon to help rectify this crazy situation I got myself in.  And yes, having a family of six is quite the situation.  Fingers crossed my new found assistant can help me get that cape back on.  Fingers crossed my baby won’t be born on the freeway.  And fingers crossed I can channel my inner resilient NYC self real soon!

I would love to hear from you!  Comment below and tell me your thoughts on LONG commutes!  And if you have done it pregnant!

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6 comments

  1. Oh hunnnnny!!!! My word- I feel ya sister-girl! I’m not sure if LA traffic dwarfs Manhattan at all but if it doesn’t then I’m sure it comes close! I chuckle so much when I have to endure the lament of native San Diegans, denounce their heavy ‘traffic’ ugh!!!! No doubt it is a bonafidw metro city so there will be congestion from time to time- rush hour always the worst. But I use to shout at the 101/405 interchange coming from San Fernando valley where I grew up just to get a few miles over the hill to Brentwood was a flipping disaster! It gives me hives just thinking of those days and all the stress (and yes I’m a typical ‘LA’ driver;)) I was preggo with both my boys whilst living in SD; so yes those roads were many times more forgiving for my usual outburst of morning (aka last all damn day) sickness; much easier to pull over to the side and let those hormones tell my body that I’m sitting on a heavily bobbing boat instead of car-let the nausea have its ‘right of way’ ; I was forever ‘yielding’ to outgoing traffic, lol.

    1. Danielle Lucia Schaffer

      thanks for sharing your stories natashia…. I always love reading them… I think LA is very similar to NY as far as traffic… for sure…

  2. Hang in there, Girl! You’ve got this! Stay focused on the amazing community and home you are moving into in a couple short months. By the end of the year, you will have forgotten about the commute, pregnancy legs and the panic of delivering your 4th kid on the 5. At thanksgiving time, your kids will be playing outside in the cul-de-sac with a bunch of school/neighborhood friends – and you will be holding your perfect little newborn baby enjoying a big glass of wine in your dream kitchen and house. And this bullshit will be a distant memory! Can’t wait for you to move into the hood!

    1. Danielle Lucia Schaffer

      Exactly what I needed to hear…. from my soon to be neighbor sista friend…. thanks for this impending reminder of where I will be soon enough…. xoxoxox

  3. I live in traffic all day long. I am a nanny. I commute kids to and from school, 14 miles away, as well as dance classes, karate, soccer, and boy scouts to name a few. While they are at school, I work for a deli delivering food to everywhere in about a 15 mile radius because my boss is so nice that she cant say no. Lets just say my mechanic and I are on a first name basis. As much as I hate it, I really do enjoy driving. I could never have an office job and I could never be a trucker, so it really is perfect for me. I get paid to sit in my car, listen/sing to my radio, and look at the most beautiful scenery. But as I am about to get married and start my own family, I think of all crazy drivers out there and it terrifies me! And there are days when I get cut off and tailed so much that it really gets to me. Even tho Im a great driver, I cant control the not so good drivers around me.
    But life goes on and you cant just not leave your house just because Ive seen more than my share of bad accidents. I need to let go of the reigns and realize that I cant always make a 14 hr road trip solo back home. I might be a horrible passenger driver but hey, its a start.
    Thanks for sharing! I love reading your posts, always.

    1. Danielle Lucia Schaffer

      so true…. love that you shared this xoxoxox

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